Septimius

  • Personal Information

    Username : Septimius
    My Rating :    
    My Reviews : Show Me
    Gender : male
    Education :
    --B.A., UCLA in English Language in Literature (magna cum laude)

    --M.A., in the Humanities from the University of Chicago with an emphasis on theology and Renaissance literature

    --Ph.D (incomplete) from another University of California institution, with an emphasis on Renaissance poetry, theology, and philosophy

    Location Information

    Location : East Coast

    Profile

    Past Employment :
    Past employment relative to writing dope-ass papers:

    TA in the Univeristy of California system for 3 years. I've taught courses ranging from Af-Am studies, to Shakespeare, from the Canterbury Tales to the (fucking stupid and pretentious) House of Leaves. I've written articles on Renaissance literature and presented my work at conferences across the country. 

    Other work includes:
    --Barista (I'm an English major, so of course I worked for Starbucks)
    --Personal Trainer
    --Butcher 
    --Peddler of books and words
    Profile :
    Hi, all! I'm a late 20s native Calfornian (sup, bro?) who made the awkward decision to never learn how to surf. This was mostly because movies like Jaws indoctrinated a fear of the deep ocean in me, but also because I'm clumsy as fuck, and would probably smash my head on a coral reef or something. And that wouldn't necessarily help you, right? 

    I moved to the east coast in 2016 after I decided that finishing my Ph.D in English Literature wasn't worth it, either monetarily or--quite frankly--emotionally. The shit is stressful, ya'll, and the payoff is minimal at best. So I figured I would start a new career path and make some extra bucks on the side here. 

    My hobbies include:
    Reading (duh)
    Gaming (Overwatch and Hearthstone, anyone?)
    Film 
    Drinking scotch
    Writing/reading poetry
    Working out
    and drinking scotch.

    Having worked as a Traching Assistant in English in the prestigious University of California university system, I know the ins and outs of your typical (and non-typical) TA. Most TAs, when grading papers, want to gouge their fucking eyes out, so when they come across a good paper they reward it heavily. But I'm not here to write just a good paper for you, or make your discussion contributions just okay: I'm here to make you seem like a fucking literary Picasso.

    So, let's get to work.